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Author Topic: worst lyrics ever?  (Read 35035 times)
Tasha
shocking in parts but very good
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« on: November 11, 2008, 12:57:02 PM »

Think of anymore to beat these?

"Lucky that my breasts
Are small and humble
So you don't confuse
Them with mountains"
Shakira's 'Whenever, Wherever'
 Huh
or what about

"There's an insect
In your ear
If you scratch
It won't disappear"
U2's 'Staring at the Sun
 Roll Eyes
"There were plants
And birds
And rocks
And things"
America's 'Horse With No Name'
 Undecided
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I think I saw you in an ice-cream parlour, drinking milk shakes cold and long
Smiling and waving and looking so fine, don't think
You knew you were in this song
Goaty
Ewen the Navigator
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Son of a Nun


« Reply #1 on: November 11, 2008, 01:01:01 PM »

Oh, the snot has caked against my pants
It has turned into crystal

Love - Live And Let Live
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Rory.
onions aren't meant to be grated
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« Reply #2 on: November 11, 2008, 01:12:02 PM »

I love the song but my favourite worst lyric is

I have never never kissed a car before
It's like a do-oh-oh-oh-or

(that's door, in case you missed it  Grin)

Marc Bolan The Slider
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Jules Gray
Go on, groove my truffles
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« Reply #3 on: November 11, 2008, 01:12:55 PM »

Generals gathered in their masses
Just like witches at black masses
- Black Sabbath "War Pigs"

Songs she sang to me
Songs she brang to me
Words that rang in me
Rhyme that sprang from me
- Neil Diamond "Play Me"
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Now be thankful for good things below
Smithsinarazz
able to reach the G string with my little finger
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« Reply #4 on: November 11, 2008, 01:17:53 PM »

Mark & Lard did a piece on the radio about this a bit ago and their winner was:

I'm afraid of the dark
Especially when I'm in a park
And there's no-one else around
Ooh, it makes me shiver
I'm frightened of ghosts
It's the thing that I fear most
Rather have a piece of toast
Watch the evening news

Was that Gabrielle, "Life"? She was, I remember, quite gracious about their decision and explained that she'd made the lyrics up at 2am. after a night out. The song has made me giggle ever since.

Smiths    
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Mark
and if any one should ask me.........
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« Reply #5 on: November 11, 2008, 01:23:05 PM »

Rhiannon rings like a bell throu the night
And wouldnt you love to love her
Takes to the sky like a bird in flight
And who will be her lover

All your life youve never seen a woman
Taken by the wind
    Lips Sealed  Lips Sealed
Would you stay if she promised you heaven
Will you ever win

She is like a cat in the dark
And then she is the darkness
She rules her life like a fine skylark
And when the sky is starless

All your life youve never seen a woman
Taken by the wind
Would you stay if she promised you heaven
Will you ever win
Will you ever win

Rhiannon
Rhiannon
Rhiannon
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"And we should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh." Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
david stevenson
Umm, anyone remember what this topic's about?
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« Reply #6 on: November 11, 2008, 01:26:43 PM »


Oh, the snot has caked against my pants
It has turned into crystal

Love - Live And Let Live


And if you see Andmoreagain, then you might be Andmoreagain....

Iffy lyrics, wonderful music.  Hell it was 1967!  Afro
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I built the ships that sailed this river
I cut the stones that built this town
I rolled the steel at Dixons Blazes
I cried inside as they tore it all down

- STILL MY CITY
Matt Hicks
my talent is actually french polishing
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« Reply #7 on: November 11, 2008, 01:30:12 PM »


Mark & Lard did a piece on the radio about this a bit ago and their winner was:

I'm afraid of the dark
Especially when I'm in a park
And there's no-one else around
Ooh, it makes me shiver
I'm frightened of ghosts
It's the thing that I fear most
Rather have a piece of toast
Watch the evening news

Was that Gabrielle, "Life"? She was, I remember, quite gracious about their decision and explained that she'd made the lyrics up at 2am. after a night out. The song has made me giggle ever since.

Smiths    


I believe it was Des'Ree which is a shame because shortly before she release Kissing You on the Romeo and Juliet Sound Track which was quite simply lovely. Rhyming Ghost with Toast however wins it outright I think though.
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david stevenson
Umm, anyone remember what this topic's about?
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« Reply #8 on: November 11, 2008, 01:34:44 PM »

Come on Matt, have you never found yourself desperately flicking through the rhyming dictionary in the small hours?

I have.  Tongue

It wasn't till someone pointed it out that I realised I'd rhymed "ware" with "wear" in Unfinished Lace.

Doh.

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I built the ships that sailed this river
I cut the stones that built this town
I rolled the steel at Dixons Blazes
I cried inside as they tore it all down

- STILL MY CITY
Tasha
shocking in parts but very good
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« Reply #9 on: November 11, 2008, 01:35:28 PM »

"Slowly walking down the hall,
Faster than a cannonball."
oasis Champagne Supernova
if you're walking slowly how can it be faster than a cannon ball Roll Eyes Huh
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I think I saw you in an ice-cream parlour, drinking milk shakes cold and long
Smiling and waving and looking so fine, don't think
You knew you were in this song
Matt Hicks
my talent is actually french polishing
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The Mothman


« Reply #10 on: November 11, 2008, 01:35:42 PM »

Forgot to mention that whilst it is one of my favourite albums, Rattlesnakes by Lloyd Cole has the largest collection of ill fitting lyrics that seem to add to it's charm but on their own are just plain rediculous. Here is but one example.

Pumped up full of vitamins
On account of all the seriousness
You say you're so happy now
you can hardly stand
Lean over on the bookcase
If you really want to get straight
Read Norman Mailer
Or get a new tailor

Huh?
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AnnieD
Gr...Annie
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« Reply #11 on: November 11, 2008, 01:36:21 PM »

Oasis

She's Electric


She's got a sister
And god only knows how I've missed her
On the palm of her hand is a blister
And I need more time

(I see someone else just posted an Oasis lyric while I was doing mine  Wink)
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Learn From the Past, Live in the Present, Create the Future
Tasha
shocking in parts but very good
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« Reply #12 on: November 11, 2008, 01:39:03 PM »


"I drive a Rolls Royce,
Cos it's good for my voice."
 Huh what?
Children Of The Revolution, T-Rex
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I think I saw you in an ice-cream parlour, drinking milk shakes cold and long
Smiling and waving and looking so fine, don't think
You knew you were in this song
Matt Hicks
my talent is actually french polishing
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The Mothman


« Reply #13 on: November 11, 2008, 01:39:26 PM »


Come on Matt, have you never found yourself desperately flicking through the rhyming dictionary in the small hours?

I have.  Tongue

It wasn't till someone pointed it out that I realised I'd rhymed "ware" with "wear" in Unfinished Lace.

Doh.




Most of my lyrics don't ryhme anyway and i don't own a rhyming dictionary. I always fear that if I start using one I'll start using words I don't understand whcih is what, I think Lloyd Cole did for Rattlesnakes.
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abby (tank girl)
never felt happy about quinoa
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« Reply #14 on: November 11, 2008, 01:44:59 PM »


Forgot to mention that whilst it is one of my favourite albums, Rattlesnakes by Lloyd Cole has the largest collection of ill fitting lyrics that seem to add to it's charm but on their own are just plain rediculous. Here is but one example.

Pumped up full of vitamins
On account of all the seriousness
You say you're so happy now
you can hardly stand
Lean over on the bookcase
If you really want to get straight
Read Norman Mailer
Or get a new tailor

Huh?



or
'i was walking my bag through a second storey non-stop snowstorm...........'
my bag - lloyd cole
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it'll be fine.......
Matt Hicks
my talent is actually french polishing
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The Mothman


« Reply #15 on: November 11, 2008, 01:52:53 PM »

Or....You look so good when you're depressed. Lloyd Cole has a special talent for this.


Think of anymore to beat these?

"Lucky that my breasts
Are small and humble
So you don't confuse
Them with mountains"
Shakira's 'Whenever, Wherever'
 


I've never confused breats with anything other than breasts except once I thought I saw a dead heat in a Zeppelin race and also there was the opening sequence to Howards way where there's a close up of an elbow with a spot on it which you were supposed to mistake for a breast. Never fooled me.
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Mister Keith
we need more flags and tipis
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« Reply #16 on: November 11, 2008, 01:53:59 PM »

I know this is deliberate, but...

Oh darling sugar honey
When it was nice and sunny
And when I had some money
We would go and see Echo And The Bunny
Men

Since I was eight I loved you
Through garden gates I shoved you
Then there's the time I cut you
And you had to go to hospital

Now you are gone forever
Shot by your Uncle Trevor
My story seems so tragic
Ali Bongo's good at contortionism

Oh, he's much better
Than David Nixon ever was

Slowly I picked my life up
Now I go and pick the wife up
She works at Marks and Spencers
La La Lech Walesa's

When Cupid threw her last dart
You girl were still in my heart
And I love you more than ever
Even though I married Trevor


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GubGub (Al)
and that is where it gets a bit cheesy
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« Reply #17 on: November 11, 2008, 02:06:43 PM »

One that has always grated on me, & God knows I love the man and have forgiven him an awful lot but from the pen of a certain Sir P McCartney circa 1979...

"You say you don't love me, my salamander
Why won't you see me? Oh no don't answer!"

What was he thinking? It doesn't even rhyme!
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Paul
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« Reply #18 on: November 11, 2008, 02:27:32 PM »

7 signs rode on 7 stars, 7 ways to find the
long lost bards
7 days became 7 years, while Pocus laughed
and called foul jeers
7 times he cursed the 7 tears, each one
became their 7 fears
What is lost is never gained again, I've cast the
spell that eternity chained
No more to cry o' mortal soul, the astral
path is now your fortuitous role.

Possibly not the worst, but possibly the weirdest.

Love the song though.

Paul
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Jules Gray
Go on, groove my truffles
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« Reply #19 on: November 11, 2008, 02:43:06 PM »



Oh, the snot has caked against my pants
It has turned into crystal

Love - Live And Let Live


And if you see Andmoreagain, then you might be Andmoreagain....

Iffy lyrics, wonderful music.  Hell it was 1967!  Afro


I like those lyrics!  I don't understand 'em half the time, but I love 'em.

Jules
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